What Do Women Prefer Over Sex?

As much as we do know, we certainly can’t speak for every woman on the planet. For some women, sex is something that they couldn’t possibly live without and for others, it’s something they like but don’t actively seek out. If you are wondering what other things women prefer to making love, we thought we would create an article with some of the most popular methods of enjoying yourself without having sex, so here are a few things that we found by asking around and using our wisdom.

Communication

In general, women are by nature very talkative and empathetic and love to make sure those they spend time around understand them. Men try to deal with their emotions by lifting heavy weights in the gym or taking a few hours out to go drinking and partaking in sports whereas women really love to talk and think about their feelings and how to sort them out. If you do listen to your partner’s issues and take them on board without judgment or trying to fix them before she’s finished telling you what was wrong, you’ll find that your partner will respect you and your listening skills more. After she finishes telling you what she wants to tell you, she’ll probably less interested in more conversation and be more than willing to have sex. Overall, it is a win-win situation where you both benefit. She feels happy and fulfilled and so do you!

Entertainment

Women are often interested in entertainment, especially when they have been working hard at work or looking after the family, if they are mothers. This means that women really like their alone time, much like you like your gym time and going out with your friends. Studies have shown that a large portion of women prefer to watch a film or the TV over having sex, especially after a stressful day. Entertainment can easily be made more intimate. Get your partner to come and lie on your lap or curl up in bed whilst watching the film!

Me Time

A continuation of the above, women want some time to do their own thing and sometimes this will come at the expense of sex and other activities. Making time for yourself is perfectly natural and enjoyable experience, as you need to have some time to rest. Me Time is nothing to be guilty of and don’t let your partner interrupt or ruin your time alone. If necessary, tell your partner to go out and see their friends or some other activity. In your time, try to make sure you get something out of it instead of just wasting a few hours by watching the TV. Paint a picture or write a little. Perhaps you could try and learn how to meditate?

Me Time comes in many forms and it doesn’t have to be alone. If your partner is an extroverted kind of woman, she might recharge her batteries by going to the coffee shops with some of her friends and discussing what has happened in the week. With how busy everyone is nowadays, these little bits of downtime in a woman’s life are getting more and more important. Woman also like traditional ways to relax, like having a bubble bath at home and going to spa days more than having sex. For women, the enjoyment is about experiencing the senses and losing themselves in the bliss of human sensation. Try offering to massage your partner and don’t simply massage her back for 5 minutes and jump in to having sex with her. Take your time, buy some massage oils and get some candles, go the full mile and you might be surprised by the results.

me-time

Intimacy

Cuddles and communication is always going to rate higher than sex in most women’s minds. A partner giving them a spontaneous and heartfelt cuddle is much more likely to make a woman happier in the long run than a quickie in the bedroom. Personal intimacy is high on most women’s lists of things they really like and spending a little time with your partner instead of badgering them for sex all the time is likely to improve your relationship. Not only is it easy and painless to give a little more attention to your partner when they are not expecting it, it can have some great roll over effects on things in the future. Giving up your attention to pay heed to what your partner wants is a major gesture and your significant other will appreciate the effort you are putting in.

Couple-in-Bed

Shopping and Receiving Gifts

Apparently, women like to shop for new clothes or get their hair cut at the beauty parlor. Who knew!? What most people don’t understand that it doesn’t really matter how expensive the things are that they buy to improve their happiness. Buying your partner a few little things often is easy enough to do and doesn’t take make forward planning and your partner will be super happy that you were thinking about her. Buying massive gifts and over blowing everything looks a little suspicious. Women love to give and receive gifts and if you can get in to a routine where you are giving little presents often you will see a definite upturn in your partner’s mood. Shopping is scientifically proven to elate most people and this is still true with women. Try taking your partner on a little shopping trip to a different city instead of staying in on the weekend.

Better Sex

Over time, especially if you are in very long term relationships, people can get bored of their sexual routine. This means instead of wanting to have sex all the time like newlyweds, sex becomes boring and monotonous. You can fix this by injecting a little excitement in to her life. Have a look at the kind of things you could do to improve and add variety to your sex life and you’ll soon see that sex is a higher priority for your partner than you think. Try buying her Fifty Shades of Grey and seeing if she enjoys the book enough to try something inside it. As usually, if you are planning on doing anything drastic and different in your sex life, warn her before doing so. If you are usually reserved in the bedroom and then suddenly you start acting weird and doing things that she hasn’t seen you do before, it can be very disarming and uncomfortable for both of you.

Whilst there are many things that women do enjoy over sex, don’t worry if there are some things that your partner feels like doing over you. (Excuse the pun) Just like occasionally you like to go golfing or fishing, it’s not the end of the world when you get set aside whilst your partner does other things. These things are necessary for your relationship to improve and continue and acting up because your girlfriend said no once or twice is just going to make you look bad in her eyes. What other things have we missed? Tell us some of your favorite things to do instead of having sex and we’ll put them in the article.

How To Use Your Body Language

According to fairly recent studies, the amount of communication that is nonverbal is as much as 90% of all of human communication. Just think about how much is lost when you tell a joke over the phone or text someone. The lack of visual clues from body language means context is much harder to figure out, leading to a lot of misunderstanding. The actual words we use are simply a refinement of what our body language is telling people. You can use this to your advantage in dating as displaying open body language invites people in.

Gestures

Mindfully using body language can improve your day and change how people treat you. A long standing joke about people when they go travelling is that they gesture towards anything they are trying to buy as they don’t understand the language of the country they are in. By combining gestures with your words, you will be understood better in a social situation. People take cues from your gestures which can reflect your emotional state. If you see someone who is hunched over, arms across their body, you should probably leave them alone to deal with the emotions they are going through. Both of these signs are typical of someone who wishes to be left alone as they close off the body subliminally.

Using gestures in conversation can really help you make a point. Timing your gestures with your words and only using gestures which make sense will allow you take communication to another level with those around you.

You body language is a portal into your brain, revealing your true feelings about the situation at hand. If you say things that do not match the body language that you are displaying, other people notice on a subconscious level. This can make people less likely to believe you or trust you. Obviously, if you are going out on a date and all of your body language says “Leave me alone!” your date will come away from the date thinking that it all went horribly wrong, when maybe you were just shy. Try to identify common gestures you make and when you use them. This way, you can re-use the gestures with the correct verbal cue without seeming try-hard and fake. The body’s subconscious is good at spotting fake body language, so you cannot simply trick people into thinking certain things about you without serious practice.

When you are next in a social situation, try to make an effort to think about what your body language is saying and what your brain is saying. Over time you will become attuned to when and what to do when saying certain things.

Looking People In The Eye

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Young couple gazing at each other

Looking people in the eye is a highly underestimated way to make better friends and make people remember you. Whilst you might be shy to look people in the eye, you are not trying to stare them down or cow them into submission. Eye contact shows you are interested in what the other person is saying and that you wouldn’t rather be checking your Twitter feed than listening to them. In addition to showing you are interested in what the other person is saying, eye contact helps to show that you are trustworthy and have nothing to hide. When people lie, they tend to break eye contact and look around the room or away from the person you are lying to. Looking into the eyes of the person you are talking to and maintaining contact for a few seconds at a time make you seem much more friendly and alive. Whilst eye contact is generally a good thing, some cultures and countries find eye contact disrespectful or even insulting and uncomfortable. Keep it light and not too overbearing and you are way on your way to mastering your body language a little more.

Positioning Your Body

Body positioning when you are meeting and greeting people is very difficult to get right. Stray too far back or away and you are seen as impersonal and possibly aloof whereas if you are right next to someone you might make them uncomfortable as you are in their personal space and being overbearing. Your overall posture also speaks volumes about how you are feeling. Research has shown that the posture you have your body in can seriously affect your mood and responses to stimuli. For example, looking up at the chimneys when you are walking through a city inspires better mood within a matter of minutes. The act of raising your head and not staring at the floor is enough to release some happiness chemicals. Opening your body up and stretching out your arms and legs to fill up as much space as possible is a fantastic way to boost your confidence for a short period of time. Whilst doing this, people around you are subconsciously thinking “That person doesn’t even need to defend his vital organs! They must be in charge!”. By filling up more space, you are seen as more confident are powerful by those around you. Research has found that when you spend a few minutes in poses such as this, your speech skills improve and your hormonal balance changes. The opening of the rib cage also helps you breath more, calming you down.

Take Note Of Your Breathing

Following on form the last point, when people are in situation they are not comfortable in, their heart starts to race, increasing the amount that the person needs to breathe and sending their blood pressure higher. If you notice your breathing is getting quicker, take your time to slow it down and take it easy. A few seconds of calmness will help you make the most of the interesting scenario whether you are going in for a new job or even meet someone you would like to date.

Reading Other People’s Body Language

Whilst reading body language is a fairly difficult task, involving you seeing people in a variety of states, the basics are easy enough to pick up on. These tips won’t make you a crack policeman who knows when people are lying but they can help a little in uncertain social situations.

People who you know will tend to stand or sit much closer to those who you don’t know. Next time you are walking past a coffee shop, take a look through the window and you will see some interesting human behavior. People generally end up sitting as far away from other people in their vicinity, beyond reason. Of course, when there is more than one person around, the gap between people gets smaller.

In addition to people positioning themselves depending to how well they know you, people tend to move their head around depending on what is happening or being said. Those who tilt their head to the side are generally more receptive to your ideas, whilst those who cock their head and raise their eyebrows might be mentally challenging what you are saying and are waiting for a gap in the conversation to retort.

body-language

Body Language

Body language is a complicated science and many books have been written about it. Whilst you won’t be able to master it without some effort, these tips should help you navigate through conversations a little easier.

Do Money Worries Affect Your Relationships?

Money is a difficult subject to discuss for most people. Some fear that what they earn is not enough and that they should constantly strive to earn more and more money, to help their conscience and improve their life quality and happiness.

Some fear that they have too much money and wish to keep that under wraps for when it is known that you have large sums of money to hand, people around you change and seems to only wish to be around you when you are spending or giving your money to others. The complexities of money are strengthened when in the context of relationships. Throughout this article we will explore the possible effects of money on personal relations so you can be informed for the future.

money-relationships

Money Worries

Relationships are stressful to begin with and sometimes money can become a real bugbear if you let it. If you are having trouble with your finances, you must let your other half know so they can react to it. If you are married and are suddenly hit with large medical costs or need to purchase something expensive, talk to your spouse about it and see how things go from there. In a less concrete relationship however, you might feel like you need to keep how much money you have and earn under wraps. If you are usually fairly spend, when you hit money troubles, you need to talk to your partner so that they can manage expectations and give you any support you might need. If you are often spending money on things and you don’t tell your partner why you have stopped doing so, suspicion and paranoia can flare up. Obviously, this is bad for the relationship and increases the amount of stress that both of you have to deal with. Stressed and unhappy people who are worried about money don’t often have great, fulfilling relationships.

Differing Expectations

It’s possibly that your partner has different views on how to spend and use money wisely and this might causes some strain on your relationship, especially if you are using shared funds to pay for the important things like rent and food.

Whilst you might think it’s totally fine to spend thousands of dollars over the course of a shopping spree, your partner might have been thinking about investing the money or using it on something else. Spending your shared resource pool without telling your other half what you are buying and why is a fantastic way to end up single. Try to talk to your partner about how they deal with money if it could cause any trouble for the relationship. If you don’t share funds with your partner, you can afford to be a little more lenient with your cash.

Debt

If you are in debt, you must let your partner know. If you are to be married and have huge credit card debt or any like source of debt make sure you talk to your partner about it. When married or in a relationship for extended periods of time, you can apply for bank loans as a single entity. What this means for those who have debt is that you will negatively affect your partner’s credit rating, which can lead to bigger surprises down the road. Say you both wanted to buy a house together and you are relying on a bank loan to pay for the home. If you don’t tell your partner about the debt or vice versa, you may well be declined any type of loan and have to find the money from another source. If you have lied your way to this point in the relationship, your partner will probably be extremely angry at you for not telling them before. Debt is not a good state to be in, financially, and you should try to pay back any debts you owe as quickly as possible. Paying back your debts on time and in full means you will actually increase your credit rating over time and this will help repair any negative marks on the credit score you may have accumulated up to this point. Whilst you are your partner might have to live a little less affluently, you will be better off in the long run.

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Couple having Debt problem

Stressing About Money

Younger couples are often worried about their finances as they are just learning how to live with each other and deciding how to deal with their finances, among many other things. Avoiding the difficult conversation with your spouse when they are lavishly spending when you don’t think you can afford it is not wise. Creating a budget between the two of you with allowances for both you and your partner can ease the stress of trying to piece together what was spent on what. Taking notes of everything you buy and keeping your receipts is easily done with something like Evernote and you can use this to perform a pseudo audit on your spending if it gets out of control. Be honest about how much money you can seriously afford to spend and stick to spending that amount. Whilst restricting yourself like this will make you temporarily less happy, the stability you get from having some stored cash will easily make up for it. When you do talk to your significant other about money, make sure you haven’t recently been rowing and arguing as debates like this are serious, time-consuming and need to be done correctly. Approaching the subject in a non threatening manner is very important for keeping the harmony in your relationship. This means if you are very generous with your money and your partner is a hoarder, to realize the good points of keeping money without compromising so much that you feel trapped. Blaming others or yourself for your financial stresses doesn’t improve your relationship, so really try not to do it. People get very heated when they are discussing money and if you or your partner get angry, step away and give it a few minutes.

Whilst money is an important facet of relationships, it’s not the only thing that matters. If you are constantly rowing about the fact your partner is spending when you should both be saving, approach the problem in a constructive manner. You don’t want to fall out over money troubles and sabotage your entire relationship for the sake of a little bit of money. Focusing too much on the fiscal side of things means you will miss out on any of the enjoyment of your relationship. Keeping your books up to date and showing your significant others all methods of income you have allows your budgeting to be calculated more efficiently and shows where any debt or incoming money is coming from. You might find it’s more effective to make money from a revenue stream that you hadn’t noticed before. Your relationship will suffer if there are money troubles but a dedicated couple will always be able to work through them and will become much stronger after doing so. Your checkbook balance is irrelevant in the grand scheme of things, studies have shown that having ‘enough’ money to get by on makes you just as happy as those who have multimillions in their bank accounts.